


Undying Champion

by TheHonoraryAmerican



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV), Gymnastics RPF
Genre: AU, Angst, Drama, F/M, Fluff, Gymnastics, Olympic Games, Olympics, Other, Romance, Willifer, london 2012
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-15
Updated: 2019-01-29
Packaged: 2019-08-24 00:36:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 19,555
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16629515
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheHonoraryAmerican/pseuds/TheHonoraryAmerican
Summary: After starting gymnastics as a 4 year old in 1998, Jennifer Jareau's Olympic sized dreams were solidified when she watched Carly Patterson win all-around gold in Athens in 2004. Her dreams of a long and successful gymnastics career are primed and ready to happen, especially with the London 2012 Olympic Games just around the corner. But insecurities threaten to tear her down, as do the harsh words of the naysayers. As if that wasn't enough to deal with, uncertainty swirls about where she stands with her childhood best friend, William LaMontagne Jr. Can she overcome it all and prove to the world that she is an Olympic class gymnast through and through... an undying champion.NB: will carry on into the canon universe of JJ joining the BAU. The story is way less OOC than this summary makes it seem.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I created this work as gymnastics is a sport I greatly love and enjoy. I wanted to create something involving my favourite TV characters (from Criminal Minds), that also crossed into the wonderful gym world. I chose not to create original characters for the gymnastics world as there are just too many, and I wanted to write about their incredible achievements through another's perspective. I hope you love and enjoy this universe as much as I do! This is actually the second attempt at UC - I started it over on fanfiction.net and then decided I wanted to do it with more detail! I will update as much as possible, so never fear about a long absence! I will always be back!
> 
> Huge huge thank you to Jordon (littleoblivion on ff.net) for riffing with me, helping me write my scenes, writing me scenes herself to keep me motivated - I couldn't do it without you!

‘Deep breath. In... out’

Chaifetz Arena was abuzz with energy. Her eyes were closed, but all around her, the excited audience cheered for the gymnasts out on the floor. Someone’s floor music was playing... Mykayla Skinner’s, she was pretty sure. A loud thud followed by applause told her she had landed a tumbling pass successfully.

She briefly wondered if Will was watching from home, her sweeter than sugar best friend of almost ten years. He always tried to watch her meets. He’d even flown out to Minnesota with her parents last year to watch the competition live.

The thought sent a sharp flutter of nerves into her stomach.

‘Focus Jareau’

She flicked her eyes open, the sounds of the arena coming screaming into blinding colour. She was standing on the end of a chalky blue runway, bookended at the opposite end by the dusty vaulting table. Down to her left, her lifelong coach, Nicholas ‘Nick’ Romero was leaning against the raised podium, watching, waiting for her to get her green flag.

‘Deep breath’

_“So we’re going to head over to the vault where we have Jennifer Jareau about to compete, just about ten feet in front of us... Tim, what can you tell us about Jennifer Jareau?”_

_“Well, she’s kind of the underdog here Al. To the casual viewer, she may not be a name that sticks out to them for the Olympic team. We haven’t seen her compete the all-around since Nationals in 2010 due to an injury she sustained at the World Championships that year. But she actually did finish second behind Rebecca Bross that year... so we know she’s capable of being competitive as an all-around gymnast”_

_“And last year, she was part of that gold medal winning team in Tokyo. She showed fantastic work there, winning the world title on the balance beam and picking up another medal on floor exercise. Her bars were not as strong as I’ve seen them in the past, but her coach did say that she competed a weaker bars routine last season to try and protect that shoulder”_

_“That’s right Elfi, and she’s put in a lot of work over the off-season to get back to a competitive level”_

_“Do you think she can make the team?”_

_“I think she is most definitely in the mix! Right now, we can quite safely say that Jordyn Wieber, Gabby Douglas... and probably Aly Raisman are going to London. So that leaves a team that needs a bit of bulking out on bars, and quite honestly, a slightly stronger floor routine than Gabby’s couldn’t hurt them either. Now, if McKayla Maroney was the fourth member of that team, she would contribute on vault and floor. The only event that needs help is bars, so it depends if Marta thinks that JJ is the gymnast for the job, or if someone like... the returning Olympic Champion, Nastia Liukin, could do the job”_

_"It basically comes down to what Marta thinks she needs to boost on the team, if she takes the three most likely candidates”_

Finally. The green flag.

“On vault for Romero’s, Jennifer Jareau!”

A polite round of applause sounded for her as she stepped up to the line marker and raised her arms into a salute.

She breathed in deeply once more. She rubbed the tips of her fingers together, ensuring they were well chalked; a habit she’d picked up in the Junior Olympic system and kept to this day.

_"This should be a nice clean start for JJ... if I know anything about her coach, it’s that he does not let her return to full competition until she’s ready to do so”_

Stepping back as she poised herself to run, she fixed a steely gaze against the apparatus. Moments later, she had taken off down the runway, hurdling powerfully into her round off. She felt like her hands barely brushed the placement mat before she was flipping back onto the table. With a hard push, she blocked away from the suede topped surface, pulling her arms up towards her body as she started to rotate through the air.

Seconds later, it was all over. Her feet hit the mat as she straightened up facing the vault table, having completed two clean twists in the air.

She was happy with that, she thought as she turned and presented to the judges. She knew she’d piked her hips down towards the end, but overall, it was a solid start for her.

“That was good,” Nick said softly, giving her a high five as she walked down the stairs and fell into step beside him as they walked back along the edge of the podium. “I always think you can get some more height, which will help you not pike down as much in the air. It’s something we can keep working on”

“Ok,” she agreed, giving him a smile as they reached the chair bank. He gave her a pat on the shoulder as she found her bag and dropped down into the chair beside it.

“Nice job JJ,” came the voice of Jordyn Wieber as she unzipped her bag and dug out her water bottle.

“Thanks Jo,” she replied, smiling at her teammate. Jordyn was the reigning national champion, as well as the reigning world all-around champion. But even with her titles and her almost guaranteed status on the Olympic team, she was one of the nicest people JJ had ever met, and they had gotten along well when they had competed in Tokyo the previous fall.

She took a swig of water, just enough to wet her mouth and throat, before closing the cap and replacing the bottle in her bag. Digging around, she found her grips bag and tape, pulling them out and dropping them into her lap. The competition continued around her as she unearthed her grips from within the soft canvas bag and set about preparing herself for the uneven bars.

This would be her first time competing her full bars difficulty since sustaining the infamous shoulder injury at the World Championships in Rotterdam two years earlier. Even two weeks earlier, at the Secret U.S. Classic, she had omitted some of the connections between her skills so as to not overdo it on her first meet of the season.

She listened, but didn’t watch, as Gabrielle “Gabby” Douglas took to the bars over in another group. Gabby was another girl she had competed with last year in Tokyo. She was a quiet, but hard working gymnast, whose release skills on the uneven bars left all of the other girls on the national team positively drooling. ‘The Flying Squirrel’ as she was affectionately known by Martha Karolyi, had most definitely put together another stunning routine judging by the cheers.

“On floor exercise for Brestyan’s, Alexandra Raisman!”

Hearing the name of her best friend, JJ immediately looked up. She usually had a rule of not watching anyone else compete so as not to make herself nervous. But she always watched Aly’s routines. And Aly always watched hers.

 _Hava Nagila_ started, thumping out of the overhead speakers with intensity and passion. Aly held her head up with pride, waiting for that first note on which she would begin to move.

For Aly, this was her second season competing this floor routine, and JJ knew just how much it meant to her personally. Aly’s family were proud Jewish people who valued hard work, passion, but most importantly, family, and JJ knew this particular routine spoke to the core of her traditional values she was so proud of.

She sprung to life, stepping forward and flourishing both of her hands before pulling back into the corner for her first tumbling line. JJ watched, transfixed by Aly’s natural ability on the apparatus as she carried out the tumbling pass she was becoming well known for; round-off, 1.5 step-out, round-off, back handspring, double Arabian flip, rebounded directly into a laid out punch front.

Each tumbling pass was put solidly to her feet, just as Aly was known for, and it seemed like it ended all too soon when she swooped through her final movement and struck her finishing pose.

“For Brestyan’s, Alexandra Raisman!”

Aly saluted, turning and heading over to the stairs where her coach, Romanian expat Mihai Brestyan, was waiting for her. As she reached the steps, she happened to glance up in JJ’s direction. Catching the eye of her friend, she grinned, giving her a thumbs up before descending the podium.

It felt like hours later, but was probably only twenty minutes or so, that JJ was standing beneath the uneven bars, waiting yet again for her green flag. She had a feeling she was going to be doing a lot of waiting at these Championships. Because of the sponsorship deal between NBC and USA Gymnastics for the upcoming Olympic Games, NBC didn’t want any of the top contenders for the team competing at the same time. This was to ensure they could get all the ‘important’ routines on live television. To JJ, it didn’t seem fair; all the girls here had worked hard to qualify to nationals. Just because some of the girls didn’t really have a chance at making it through to the Trials, it didn’t make their routines any less important.

Either way, she had had to wait because Gabby was on beam. But Gabby had just dismounted, so surely, any moment now, she was up.

Sure enough, her flag came just moments later.

“On uneven bars for Romero’s, Jennifer Jareau!”

She saluted quickly, turning her attention to the low bar as Nick focused himself at the side of the apparatus. Being that she was still regaining confidence on the event, he was there to spot her through her releases, a backup in case she fell.

Not that she was planning on doing that.

* * *

_“So we round up the first night of competition for the women at the 2012 Visa Championships. As expected, Jordyn Wieber is out in front, with Gabby Douglas nipping at her heels. Holding her own in third is Pittsburgh’s own Jennifer Jareau, and her partner in crime, her best friend Aly Raisman, is right behind her in fourth. This Olympic team selection is shaping up to be VERY interesting indeed!”_

“I saw you standing there for bars, you were up there for _ages_ , I was like ‘oh my god, just let her go already!’” Aly jabbered as she slung an arm around JJ’s shoulder. They were walking out of the arena, following Jordyn’s coach, John Geddert, as he led them on the short walk back to the hotel. The hotel allocations for Championships were always organised by each attending gym, but being that Aly and JJ got along so well, Mihai and Nick had taken to making joint bookings. As it so happened, this year, they had also picked the hotel where Twistars, Chow’s, and GAGE teams, the teams of Jordyn Wieber, Gabby Douglas, and Sarah Finnegan respectively, were staying as well.

“It’s so stupid. Like, if we’re there, ready to go, let us go. Show it on replay. I don’t care if Will sees it five minutes after it happened,” JJ groaned. Aly laughed, pushing on the double glass doors as they reached the street.

“I love how Will’s the first person that comes to mind,” she teased.

“He’s the only person I know of that’s definitely watching on TV,” JJ said dryly. “Some of my school friends might be watching, but they usually wait to hear how I went first. I think I scarred them for life in Rotterdam”

“Honey, you scarred everyone for life in Rotterdam, but it’s ok, because we still got a silver medal out of it”

Laughing, JJ shook her head, hoisting her backpack higher on her back as they strolled behind John up the sidewalk towards the hotel.


	2. Chapter 2

Three of the medals she had earned hung proudly around her neck as she stood atop the podium in the center of the arena. She couldn’t stop the smile that had found its way onto her face from the moment the gold medal was placed around her neck.

For the third year running, she had won the senior national title on balance beam, her standout event. In addition to her gold medal for beam, she had also managed two bronze medals; one in the all-around competition, just a few tenths ahead of Aly, and the other on the uneven bars. Another result she had achieved, but was yet to be awarded for, was finishing second behind Aly on floor.

Looking to her right, she broke into an even bigger grin as Aly beamed up at her from the adjacent podium. It always felt good to share the podium with her best friend. But in a season like this one, heading into the Olympic Games, it felt even better.

Like she could handle anything that the year decided to throw at her.

* * *

“Hey peanut, good job!”

Her father’s excited voice met her ears as she walked through the crowded foyer in search of him and her mother. Looking in the direction of his praise, she spotted them waiting near the kiosk, breaking into a beaming smile as she quickened her pace towards them.

She got to her dad first, throwing her arms around his middle as he wrapped her in a warm hug. He was beaming from ear to ear, love and pride radiating from every inch of his body as he held his youngest daughter in a tight hug.

Michael Jareau was by no means a small man. Standing at just over six feet tall, he projected an air of confidence about himself by the very way with which he walked. But as intimidating as he may have looked, those who came to know him would quickly learn he had a golden heart, and a nature as gentle as they came.

“What did you think of my bars?” JJ asked with a smile as she pulled away and turned to her mom.

“They were great! They’re looking so much better!” Michael praised as Sandy pulled her daughter into a hug.

“You looked fantastic out there JJ... we’re so proud of you,” Sandy gushed, before pulling back and glancing down at the medals hanging proudly around JJ’s neck. She lifted a hand, lightly fingering the gold medal that read **2012 NATIONAL CHAMPION – WOMEN’S BALANCE BEAM**.

“So,” Michael said, letting out a breath. “Olympic Trials next, hey?”

Slowly, JJ nodded, a small smile creeping across her face.

“Yeah... but let’s just get through the next two weeks first”

* * *

“How’s my favourite gym bugs?”

Both Nick and JJ turned at the sound of the familiar voice. Nick’s face lit up as he recognised his wife, Tasha, walking towards them. Nick and JJ had only arrived back from Missouri the previous evening, but for a prospective Olympian, there was no time to rest. JJ had just two weeks to perfect her routines ahead of the US Olympic Trials in San Jose, and it was imperative they used the little time they had wisely. And so it was that they were back in the gym, straight back to it.

“Hey sweetheart. What are you doing here?” Nick said warmly, setting down the chalk he’d been breaking up and heading across the floor to meet her. JJ stayed seated on the edge of the floor, taping her fingers up in preparation to do her bars drills for the day.

“I was passing by... thought I’d drop in and see how you’re going. Hey JJ, great job at nationals by the way!”

“Thanks!” JJ called back, flashing Tasha a smile.

“Don’t you come near me with those chalky hands Nicholas,” Tasha scolded lightly as Nick approached her with a mischievous glint in his eye.

“Or what?”

“You can make your own dinner tonight, that’s what,” Tasha said with a grin.

“I’ll get my mom to bring him a plate,” JJ chimed in, getting a laugh out of Nick.

“Oh, so that’s how it’s going to be now?” Tasha replied, a flirtatious smile hanging around her mouth as she looked pointedly at her husband.

“Yeah,” he chuckled, reaching around her and slapping her ass playfully, leaving a bright white chalky hand print against the denim of her jeans.

“Nicholas!” Tasha exclaimed as Nick and JJ howled with laughter. “God, you’re like a child”

“You love me,” Nick replied with a grin. Tasha rolled her eyes in defeat, grinning as she leaned in and pressed a quick kiss to his lips.

“I’ll see you tonight. JJ, keep him in line for me!” she called out as she turned and headed back for the foyer.

“Always,” JJ laughed, pulling herself to her feet as she buckled her grips around her wrists.

Nick chuckled to himself, before turning back to his gymnast. “Alright kiddo. Let’s drill this routine until you can do it in your sleep”

* * *

Later in the evening, after she’d showered off the chalk and had something to eat, JJ was spending some of her free time unpacking her bag from nationals, and repacking it with the things she would need for Trials.

She carefully laid out all her national team leotards from the past three years. She would have to pick two (and a spare, just to be safe) to take to the meet... but she had so many favourites, it was just a decision she couldn’t make straightaway.

“Excited?”

JJ jumped, whirling around to find her mom standing in the doorway. Sandy held out a hand to her, chuckling. “Sorry... I didn’t mean to frighten you”

JJ softened, her face relaxing into a smile. “I’m nervous... it’s a lot of pressure... but yes, I am excited”

Smiling, Sandy stepped forward, putting an arm around JJ’s shoulders as they both turned to look down at the leotards spread across her bed. Even at almost eighteen years old, JJ was so much smaller than her mother, standing at just four feet, ten inches tall.

Considering JJ had arguably matured and grown up a lot quicker than her peers thanks to her life’s devotion to her sport, Sandy sometimes forgot that technically, her daughter was still a child. She was such a strong and independent girl at times, well beyond her seventeen, almost eighteen years of life.

“A little bit of nerves is always good,” Sandy said with a smile. “I think you’ve always performed better when you’re a little nervous”

JJ nodded, lifting a hand up on top of her mother’s, which was resting on her shoulder.

“I just want you to know... no matter what happens in the next couple of weeks, your dad and I are incredibly proud of you. You’ve worked so hard for this opportunity... we’re supporting you all the way,” Sandy said warmly, pulling JJ into a hug.

“Thanks Mom,” JJ replied quietly, wrapping her arms around her mom and holding on for a moment. No matter what was going on in her life, there was always time for a comforting hug from her mom.

Pulling back, she gave her mom one last smile before moving over to her closet as Sandy took a seat on the edge of the bed, carefully lifting a few leotards out of the way so as not to crush them.

“Ready for the meet?” Sandy asked as JJ rifled through the contents of her closet.

“I think so. It’s going to be kind of weird though... like I know in a way, it’s no different to worlds selection... but competing knowing that five of us will be going to London and the rest won’t is a little sad,” JJ replied, selecting a few items and carrying them over to her bag.

Sandy didn’t reply. Now that the number of days until the Olympic team was decided had dropped under twenty, the reality of it was hitting home. Her daughter was an exceptional gymnast, a World Champion who could hold her own amongst the best of the best... but in Martha Karolyi’s eyes, was JJ part of the package she wanted to send to the Olympics?

Years and years of hard work and determination had culminated in a real shot at the ultimate dream, but what would they do if JJ was relegated to alternate, or left off the team entirely? Of course, they would still be proud of her for all she had achieved, but they had put in all the time over the years with the hope of it resulting in an Olympic berth.

Sandy couldn’t help but feel like they would flounder if JJ didn’t make the team. Floating in transition from Olympic hopeful to the one who didn’t make it.

She was broken from her thoughts by JJ placing a hand on her shoulder.

“No matter what happens,” she said softly.

“No matter what happens,” Sandy replied with a smile, feeling a sense of relief flood through her at the realisation that regardless of the outcome of the Olympic Trials, JJ would be ok.

If all else failed, surely, her determined girl would fight onward for Rio.

“Knock knock,” came a familiar voice, followed by a tap against the door frame. JJ broke into a happy smile as the head of her closest friend, William “Will” LaMontagne Jr. poked around the frame.

“Hey you. Come to bask in my championship glow?” JJ teased. Will laughed, strolling into the room and dropping himself down in JJ’s desk chair.

“Always. Hi Sandy. Hope you don’t mind me coming in, Michael let me up,” he said warmly.

“You know you’re always welcome here Will,” Sandy replied with a smile, rising up off the bed and heading for the door. “Have you eaten? Michael made lasagna”

Will’s face lit up. “I have... but there’s always room for lasagna”

Sandy laughed. “I’ll make you a plate,” she chuckled, heading out of the room and down the stairs as JJ shook her head at her friend.

“You’re such a guy,” she laughed, picking up one of her leotards and examining it closely.

“Gee, JJ, when did you notice?” Will replied dryly, making her giggle again as he pulled himself out of the desk chair and crossed the room. “What are you doing?”

“Trying to decide which leotards I want to take to Trials,” she sighed. “It’s so hard. I love them all”

“Why can’t you wear the blue one from nationals? You looked really nice in that one,” Will asked.

The compliment sent a warm feeling through JJ’s chest, making her bite back a smile. She shook it off, picking up the red leotard with the white sleeves they had worn in the team final the previous year.

“It’s not a national team leotard. I can pick any of the leotards I’ve worn while representing the USA, but I can’t wear any of the ones I’ve worn while representing my gym. Does that make sense?”

Will nodded. “Well, I’m a guy, as you so perfectly pointed out, so my fashion sense isn’t fantastic-“

JJ laughed.

“-but that one you’re holding is really nice, I remember I liked it when I was watching you at Worlds... and maybe... this pink one? Isn’t this the one you wore when you won your title last year?”

JJ nodded, picking up the metallic pink garment and running it between her fingers.

“I like that,” she said softly, setting them aside before clearing her bed of all the other leotards. “Thanks”

“Anytime,” Will sighed, flopping onto her bed with a dramatic fall. “I do my best”

Laughing, JJ held out her hand to him. “Come on. You need to come and eat your lasagna”

* * *

** TERMINOLOGY GUIDE **

_Pike/pike down –_ one of the three body shapes in gymnastics movements. The gymnast’s torso and legs are straight, with a bend of at least 90 degrees in her hips. From the side, it is very much like an ‘L’. In execution deductions, a move that is supposed to be laid out may be considered **piked down** if the gymnast displays a significant bend in the hips.

 _Layout –_ one of the three body shapes in gymnastics movements. The entire body is completely stretched out from head to toe, in a straight line. An angle of wider than 90 degrees in the hips will be considered laid out and vice versa.

 _Tucked –_ one of the three body shapes in gymnastics movements. The gymnast bends her hips as if she is piking, and also bends her knees to as to draw them in to her chest. This is considered the easiest position in which to rotate.

 _Round-off –_ a fundamental of gymnastic tumbling. A round-off is a cartwheel during which the gymnasts legs come together and her hands leave the ground before her feet touch the ground on the other side. Her feet will take off separately as in a cartwheel, but land simultaneously, and she will land facing back towards the way she started. Gymnasts can tumble directly out of a round-off, but the vast majority will continue the movement into a back handspring.

 _Back handspring –_ a move in which the gymnast swings her arms backwards and jumps from two feet, flipping backwards and landing on her hands as her feet come over her head, before quickly springing from the floor onto her feet. Usually used as an intermediary skill for high level tumbling.

 _1.5 step-out –_ a popular skill in the 2009-2012 floor code, when combination passes were a requirement. From a round-off, the gymnast launches up and back into a single laidout flip. At the same time, she twists around her longitudinal axis one and a half times, landing in the direction which she is tumbling and immediately stepping out into a connecting skill.

 _Double Arabian –_ from a backwards landing (i.e. a **round-off** or a **back handspring** ), the gymnast launches into the air, immediately executing a half turn once her feet have cleared the ground. This changes the tumbling direction to forward, as she will rotate forwards in a tucked position about her lateral axis, before landing on her feet.

 _Punch front –_ from a two footed jump, the gymnast executes a single forward flip in the body position of her choice. Commonly executed at the end of tumbling passes to gain connection bonus, but can also be seen on the balance beam.


	3. Chapter 3

“And... UP!” Nick yelled as she swung through the bottom of her swing and flicked her feet into the air. Soaring over the bar, she flew through a huge straddled Tkatchev. Outstretched fingers scrabbled at the chalky surface of the bar, but ultimately, she missed her catch. With a loud THWACK against the crash mat, she came down hard on her knees, letting out a heavy sigh.

“Ok,” Nick said softly, pushing away from the pillar he was leaning on and slowly approaching her. “You’re exhausted... why don’t we leave it for now, and you can try it again this afternoon when you’re feeling a bit more refreshed?”

JJ looked up at him, her eyes screaming at him just how tired her body was. But underneath the exhaustion was a familiar sparkle, the determination that had gotten her to this point in her career.

“Can I try one more time?” she asked. “I don’t want to go home on a fall”

Nick took a deep breath, seeming to mull it over before he nodded. Holding out a hand, he helped her to her feet. Far behind him, he heard the distant slam of the gym’s glass doors; Michael had come to pick JJ up from training, as he often did in the summer when he wasn’t working.

“I’ll cut you a deal,” he said, a small smile playing around his mouth. “You give it everything you’ve got and nail that Tkatchev... I’ll give you the rest of the day off. I think you’ve earned a little break”

JJ’s eyes seemed to light up.

“Really? But I need to train... Trials-“

“One afternoon off isn’t going to hurt your chances, I promise,” Nick said gently. “If you make the Olympic team... you’re going to be very busy for the rest of the year. I’m giving you an opportunity now to relax... get your head on straight. You’ll thank me tomorrow”

Smiling, JJ nodded, adjusting her grips as she looked back up at the high bar.

Stepping back, Nick clapped his hands together. “Come on kiddo, make this one count!”

With a deep breath, she gathered all the remaining gusto she had. She jumped up, her hands grasping the wooden bar tightly. Kicking her legs back and forth a few times to generate some swing, she was able to kip up to the bar and pull up into a handstand.

She swung down once, meeting a handstand again at the top of the bar.

“Good form JJ!”

Swinging down again, she drove her legs up past her chest, arching her body through the swing and flicking it up. She let go, immediately counter-rotating as she soared backwards over the bar.

And like magnets to metal, she closed her fingers tightly around the wooden bar on the other side.

* * *

“That was a good release I saw when I came in,” Michael said conversationally as he drove towards the little shopping strip that lay between their home in East Allegheny and the gym. It was midday, and being summer holidays, there were people out everywhere enjoying the beautiful weather.

“The one before it wasn’t so spectacular,” JJ laughed, tearing her eyes away from where some kids were riding their bikes down the sidewalk as she turned to look at her dad.

“Well, we can forget all about it with some ice-cream,” Michael said with a grin. Pulling up to the intersection that led to the popular shopping area, he looked both ways, before heading around the corner and down towards the parking lot at the end.

“You know Mom will kill you,” JJ giggled.

“Your mom might kill me, but a little ice-cream isn’t going to kill you,” Michael laughed. “You’ve worked really hard Jaybird. You deserve to treat yourself every now and again”

JJ smiled as Michael pulled into the lot and then into a free bay. Clutching her phone in her hand, she unbuckled her seatbelt, pushing open the door and sliding out of the car. The sun beat down against her skin as she strolled around the car to meet her dad, reminding her that even though she spent every waking hour in the gym, summer was truly upon them.

What it must feel like to have a normal life.

They walked in comfortable silence down towards the ice-cream parlour, JJ reaching the door first. She pushed it open, a blast of cold air rushing out to meet them.

“Hi,” chirped the guy behind the counter. “How are you today?”

“Good thanks,” Michael said with a smile, following JJ up to the glass cold case and looking down at the flavours. “Just the usual, Jaybird?”

JJ grinned. “You know me so well”

Michael chuckled. “Alright, we’ll get two regular cups please. A butterscotch and vanilla... and I’ll just get mint chip please”

“Coming right up,” the young guy said, opening the cabinet from the other side. With a handsome smile thrown in JJ’s direction, he grabbed one of the takeout cups and a scoop.

A few minutes later, they were leaving the cool shade of the store and heading back out into the summer sun.

“I think he liked you,” Michael said, a teasing grin crossing his face as he took a mouthful of his ice-cream.

JJ rolled her eyes. “He doesn’t even know me”

“Take it as a compliment then. He thinks you’re pretty. And he’s not wrong,” Michael said sweetly. JJ laughed.

“Dad, are you trying to ship me off because I’m turning eighteen soon?”

“The sooner I marry you off in exchange for two cows, the better”

JJ burst out laughing, nearly inhaling some of her ice-cream as they stopped at a little bench on the sidewalk and took a seat. She coughed, prompting Michael to pat her on the back as he chuckled.

When her throat was clear again, she straightened up, looking at her father with a grin.

“Is that all I’m worth to you? Two cows?” she asked, giggling.

Michael grinned. “Two of the _finest_ cows in all of the land”

JJ shook her head, giggling as she brought another scoop of ice-cream up to her mouth.

They ate in silence for a few minutes, watching the world drift slowly past them on that warm summer’s day in June. For a moment, JJ felt like the pace of her own life had slowed... for this moment, she was just a seventeen year old girl, enjoying summer break.

“Are you feeling prepared for Trials?” Michael asked as he reached over and tossed his cup in the bin. Looking towards JJ, he took her empty cup from her hand with a smile and disposed of it as well.

“I think so,” JJ said softly. “I think I’ll just mostly be glad when it’s over... it’s a lot of pressure”

“Mhm,” Michael hummed, nodding in agreement. “You always handle pressure very well though. It’s one of your best qualities, I think... that you keep it together so well”

“Thanks,” JJ breathed.

A short silence followed, the sounds of the world surrounding them before JJ looked up at her dad. As intimidating as he looked to strangers, he had the kindest heart. Her entire life in gymnastics, she had always been able to count on him to be her biggest cheerleader. No matter the meet, no matter the day, she knew he would be in the stands cheering as she competed.

“Dad?” she said softly, pulling his attention. He looked at her expectantly, waiting for her to continue.

“What... what are you going to do... if I don’t make the team?” she asked, her voice getting smaller with every word.

Michael hesitated for a moment, seeming to weigh his next move. But eventually, he lifted an arm, putting it around JJ’s shoulders and giving her a comforting squeeze as he kissed the top of her head.

“Give you the biggest hug I’ve ever given you... and then support whatever you decide you want to do next,” he said softly, noticing when she relaxed under his hold.

“I love you Dad,” she whispered, making a small smile cross Michael’s face.

“I love you too peanut. Come on. Best get you home or your mom will start getting suspicious”

* * *

“JJ!”

At her mom’s call, JJ rose up off her bed, where she’d been sitting and absently scrolling through Instagram.

“What?” she called back as she reached the door.

“Will’s here!” Sandy exclaimed.

Smiling a little, she crossed the landing, making her way down the stairs. As she came down, she spotted Will leaning against the banister waiting for her.

“Hey,” she said with a grin, stopping a few steps from the bottom. “Something I can help you with?”

“Well, I’m really bored,” Will chuckled. “And you said Nick gave you the afternoon off... so I was wondering, if it’s not too beneath you, would you like to go swimming?”

JJ laughed. “Beneath me?”

“I know you athlete types,” Will teased. “Always thinking your sport is above all others”

Reaching out, JJ gave him a playful shove as he laughed.

“Keep that up and you can go swimming by yourself. I’ll call Lani to come and amuse me for the afternoon,” JJ giggled. She knew her friend Alanis, or Lani as she preferred, would be over in a heartbeat if she called.

“Ok, ok,” Will replied, holding his hands up in mock surrender. “So are you coming or not?”

“Sure,” JJ chuckled. “Give me like... ten minutes to change”

“So... half an hour?” Will shot back.

“Oh you are so asking for it,” JJ replied with a laugh, shaking her head as she turned and headed back up the stairs.

Half an hour later, they were walking into the local outdoor swimming pool. Even in the heat of the summer sun, it wasn’t as busy as they had been expecting, and they were able to grab two sun lounges beneath an umbrella.

“Last one in is a chicken,” Will teased, throwing his stuff down on his lounge and pulling his shirt over his head.

“You’re STILL using that old line? I haven’t heard that since we were like, ten,” JJ laughed, dropping her shorts down her legs.

Will opened his mouth to reply, but was almost immediately distracted by JJ’s toned body becoming more and more visible to him by the second. Even at her tiny stature of just four feet, ten inches, her legs suddenly looked miles long poking out from her blue bikini bottoms.

Her shirt quickly joined her shorts, and Will had to forcibly remind himself not to stare at her perfectly flat yet muscled stomach. Swallowing hard, he willed himself to keep it together.

So he did the only thing he thought possible.

Taking a step towards her as she approached the edge of the pool, he reached out and gave her a light shove. Just enough to knock her off balance and into the pool.

With a splash, she disappeared for a moment beneath the water, before surfacing with a shocked expression.

“Will!” she laughed, splashing some water in his direction.

“Heads up!” he yelled, leaping off the edge of the bricks and into the water, splashing JJ in a wave of water. She laughed, swimming away from him as he swam to the bottom and grabbed her ankle.

“Hey!” she yelled, kicking to make him let go. He did so, surfacing with a grin.

“What are you gonna do about it?”

“Oh you are so cocky,” she laughed, splashing him again.

“That’s one word for it,” Will laughed.

After nearly an hour of mucking around in the pool, Will was sitting on his sun lounge, while JJ dried herself off.

As he watched her out of the corner of her eye, he suddenly spotted something on her hip he hadn’t noticed before. Jumping up, he approached her.

“Hold up a sec,” he said suddenly, grabbing her waist and turning her to the side.

“Wait… what are you doing?” she laughed as he bent down slightly and peered at her hip.

“Jennifer Jareau, what did you do to yourself?” he chuckled, bringing his thumb to rest on the bright purple mark that graced her hip bone.

Twisting around, she caught sight of what he was looking at and started to laugh.

“Oh that… I wiped out big time on beam last week. Like, fell in the worst direction possible and hit the beam so hard I winded myself,” she explained.

Will laughed. “I thought you were the World Champion”

“Only sometimes,” she replied with a grin, making him laugh again as he let her go.

By evening, she was home, showered, and waiting for dinner.

An afternoon off from gymnastics had been a blessing. Just getting to be a normal teenager, hanging out with her best friend... it had been exactly what she needed with the final stage of the selection process looming like a cloud.

Not that she didn’t want to go to London. She wanted it more than anything in the world.

But sometimes... sometimes it was good just to breathe.

* * *

** TERMINOLOGY GUIDE **

_Tkatchev_ – also known as a reverse hecht. From a **backward giant** , the gymnast arches her body up as she reaches horizontal to the ground and releases the bar. With a counter movement back over the high bar, she clears the bar and catches it again on the other side, continuing either into the downswing or a second skill. Can be done in a straddled (most common), piked, or layout position (rare).

 _Backward giant_ – a swing around the high bar in a completely stretched body position. The gymnast is facing forwards as she swings. If she were to release the bar for a dismount, she would rotate through a backwards salto, hence the name backward giant.

 _Forward giant ­_ – the opposite of a backward giant in that if the gymnast were to release the bar for a dismount, she would rotate through a forward salto.


	4. Chapter 4

“Ok… don’t worry about it Jason, I’m sure we’ll be able to find someone who wants to go… if not, we’ll be able to sell it for sure, the tickets sold out weeks ago… yes, I know… I have to go Jason, but I’ll see you in California. Give Katie our love, I hope she’s feeling better soon… alright… I love you too Jason… bye”

The tail end of her mother’s conversation met her ears as she came crashing through the front door after morning training. Dropping her backpack by the hall table, she tossed her keys into the dish and kicked the door closed behind her.

“Good god JJ, how many times have I told you not to throw that door around like that!”

“Sorry,” JJ replied, drifting into the kitchen where her mom looked as though she was about to start making lunch. “Was that Jason?”

Sandy nodded. “Your brother has given us a little bit of a situation”

JJ grinned. Her older brother was the epitome of what a big brother should be. Ten years her senior, he was, and always had been fiercely protective of JJ. But that didn’t stop him delivering his own brand of teasing and torment. ‘As is my duty to do so’ he had told her the last time they had seen each other. For, for all his goofing off, Jason had proven in his academic years to have a brain of ability that matched JJ’s gymnastics ability. Now an aeronautical engineer, he had settled in Pembroke Pines, half an hour from Miami, with his wife, Katie.

“Katie’s not well. She’s come down with the flu, as well as an ear infection, and the doctor doesn’t think it’s a good idea for her to fly all the way to California. So she’s not coming to Trials,” Sandy said, breaking JJ’s train of thought.

JJ’s face fell slightly. She had always liked Katie, and enjoyed the rare opportunities when they got to hang out. Now she would likely have to wait until Thanksgiving… that was, if she didn’t make the Olympic team.

“Is Jason still coming?” she asked softly.

“Of course,” Sandy said with a smile. “But, we have a spare ticket to Trials… I’d have no problem selling it online, considering the tickets sold out weeks ago… but I was wondering if you might want to ask Will if he would like to come”

JJ looked up, slightly surprised. “Why?”

Sandy grinned, confused by JJ’s shock. “Because he’s your best friend and he actually seemed to enjoy it that time we brought him to Nationals?”

“Oh… I was just… Trials is huge. I wasn’t quite expecting you to say that,” JJ flubbed. Sandy laughed.

“Clearly. Look, why don’t you ask Will if he wants to come. Tell him all he has to pay for is his airfare, we’ve got the rest covered. And he’ll bunk in with Jason”

“Jason will be thrilled,” JJ said dryly, making Sandy laugh again. “He just takes the mickey out of him all the time!”

“I’ll keep your brother in line,” Sandy chuckled. “Go call him, I’ll need to know as soon as possible in case I have to sell this ticket”

“Ok,” JJ said softly, turning back towards the front door. She was quick about extricating her phone from her bag, before heading up the stairs towards her room.

She had already dialed Will’s number and brought the phone to her ear by the time she reached her room, flopping down on her bed as she waited for him to pick up.

_“Well if it isn’t my favourite human terror”_

JJ laughed. “Excuse me?”

_“I’m just kidding. Hi. How was training?”_

“Intense. Nick’s voice goes up an octave each day. I think he’s a little stressed out about Trials. I actually think that by Trials, only dogs will be able to hear him”

Will laughed. _“All that and having to deal with you as well. I feel sorry for the man”_

JJ scoffed. “Rude. Maybe I’ll just keep what I was going to ask you to myself then”

_“Was it some pre-competition relaxation sex?”_

She felt the blush creeping furiously up her cheeks, and was suddenly glad she’d decided to call him in her room rather than downstairs. She didn’t know why that had made her cheeks feel so hot all of a sudden; Will made all sorts of innuendos regularly and they hardly fazed her.

“Do you think about anything _other_ than sex?”

_“Are you calling me a manwhore? Because that’s not true. I think about food”_

JJ laughed. “You are such a dude”

_“True. Anyway. What did you want to ask me?”_

“We have a spare ticket to Trials… and Mom was wondering if you’d like to come. She said all you would have to pay for is your airfare”

_“Wait, seriously?”_

“Yeah… why, do you not want to come?”

_“No, I do! That would be awesome! Give me a minute, I’ll just go check with my mom, since… I have no money to buy plane tickets”_

JJ laughed, shaking her head. She listened as he thundered down the stairs, calling out for his mom. Eventually he found her, and JJ sat there, waiting as she tried to make out the muffled sounds of conversation floating from the other end of the line.

After a little more rustling, he brought the phone back up.

_“You still there Jayje?”_

“Yeah”

_“She said she’ll pay for me to go… so I owe her big time for Christmas”_

JJ beamed. “You’re gonna love it! Although, I hope I don’t fall on my face”

Will laughed. _“I think you’ll be fine. I’m excited, I liked it when I came to Nationals”_

“Because you got to watch twenty odd teenage girls in leotards?”

_“JJ, the fact that all of you could flip straight over my head with no fear immediately cancels out any of my lusting towards any asses”_

Laughing, JJ shook her head. “I think that’s the point at which I’m going to hang up. I’ll text you the details for Trials so you can book your flights, and I guess I’ll see you soon”

_“Ok cool. Make sure Nick calms down so he actually survives to Trials”_

“I’ll do my best,” JJ chuckled.

Bidding their goodbyes, she ended the call, before heading down the stairs to tell her mom about his acceptance of her offer.

She was excited… but the fact that Will was coming also served to make her a little more nervous.

She shrugged it off. All the more adrenaline, the better.

* * *

“What are you thinking about?” Michael said cheerfully as he came into JJ’s room. She looked up from where she was sitting on her bed, one of the photos of her and her classmates held in her hands.

“All the things that have happened this year… and we haven’t even gotten to the biggest part,” she said softly, a small smile creeping onto her face. “I still can’t really believe I graduated high school”

Looking back down at the photo, she couldn’t help but smile wider. She and Will were in the center, some of their closest school friends all around them, all of them dressed in their white graduation gowns. It wasn’t from her actual graduation ceremony (that, she hadn’t been able to attend), but from the Class Day that had been held the weekend before nationals. They were all goofing off, but through it all, her diploma was clutched tightly in her hand.

_“Thank you all for coming,” Principal McKinley said, addressing the crowd that had gathered for Class Day. “Special thank yous to our parents, families, and friends because without each of you and all of you, none of this would have been possible. Today, we have the very rare and unique opportunity when we get to honour someone who is a current student, who strives for and achieves excellence at the scholastic, national, and global level. Our own Miss Jennifer Jareau has brought honour and pride to her family, her community, and East Allegheny High School through her achievements as a world class gymnast. As a member of the class of 2012, she has worked tirelessly to complete every graduation requirement, while competing around the globe as a member of the U.S. National Team and currently holding an individual world title. Unfortunately, Jennifer will not be able to be here for graduation tomorrow, because she is leaving for the U.S. National Gymnastics Championships in St. Louis, Missouri, where she hopes to qualify for the Olympic Trials in San Jose, California, and then from there, to earn a spot on this year’s Olympic team. I spoke to Jennifer and her family last week, and asked if she would like to receive her diploma today, so at this time, I would like to ask Miss Jennifer Rose Jareau up to the podium”_

_The gathered audience in the auditorium clapped as JJ rose from her chair and headed towards the stage. Her cheeks were incredibly warm, and she was sure she was blushing furiously, but she couldn’t fight off the smile on her face as she reached Principal McKinley._

_“Congratulations,” he said warmly, shaking her hand before presenting her with her academic diploma._

_“Thank you,” she beamed, both of them turning to look at the photographer as her fellow classmates cheered loudly for her._

Michael chuckled. “It’s not every year you get to graduate and go to the Olympics all at once”

“Dad,” JJ said, her voice somewhat firmer. “We don’t know if I’m going yet. We have to wait and see”

Michael leaned across, kissing her forehead lovingly before heading back towards the door.

“No matter what happens JJ... you’ve still had an incredible year. And we’re so proud of you either way”

Smiling, JJ nodded once to show she understood. She listened as he retreated back down the stairs, before setting the photo back down on her nightstand and taking a deep breath.

Just one more day before she left for Trials...

... and then the real test would begin.


	5. Chapter 5

“You have all worked very hard in training. Today is the day when you will be put to the test. Remember, we will be watching, so put on your best performance in these meets,” Martha said in her heavily textured Eastern European accent from where she stood before the girls. They were standing across the floor of the HP Pavilion, the site of the 2012 Olympic Gymnastics Trials. The entire week had consisted of two training sessions a day in the arena, conditioning, physical therapy, and very little downtime. They had lined up before Marta in their usual height order so often that they didn’t have to think twice about it now. For JJ, it was always easy… she was at the very end of the line.

“Thank you Marta, coaches, and national staff, goodbye,” the girls all replied in unison, getting a nod of dismissal from their esteemed leader. They all relaxed, turning towards the stairs as they followed each other across the floor. As the smallest girl in the group, JJ was at the back of the pack as they headed down to the sidelines to grab their bags. She took a deep breath as she waited for the throng down the stairs to dissipate.

Martha Karolyi had ruled the USA Gymnastics women’s artistic program with an iron fist since she had taken the reigns from her husband, Bela, in 2001. She had high expectations for all her girls, and even higher expectations for the select groups who made her teams. She was a stern leader, but nonetheless, JJ had craved her praise and encouragement from the very first time she’d met Martha. Martha’s approval was almost worth more than any Olympic gold medal.

Finally making her way down the steps, JJ remained silent as she headed straight for her backpack. Even as the other girls talked lightly amongst themselves, she was lost in thought.

Tonight would be the first night of competition. And for the first time she could ever remember… she wasn’t just nervous. She was a little worried. Her stomach felt uneasy, and her nerves were set on edge.

“You ok kiddo?” Nick asked softly, breaking her from her self imposed silence. “You look a little pale”

“I’m ok,” she breathed, pulling her team warm-ups on slowly as Nick sat down in the chair beside her. “Just… nervous, I guess”

Nick stayed silent for a moment, nodding understandingly as he cast his eyes across the arena. Directly across from them was the huge siding panel that read **U.S. OLYMPIC TEAM TRIALS** , hung in front of the dais where Martha Karolyi would be sitting with the selection committee that evening.

“It’s a big moment,” he concluded softly. “You’ve done the training. You’ve put in the hours… tonight is your opportunity to go out there and perform what you’ve been practicing all year. But most importantly, JJ?”

JJ looked up from zipping up her backpack, meeting her coach’s reassuring gaze.

“Tonight, you should enjoy it,” he said, a gentle smile crossing his face. “You should go out there and have fun… because yes, the Olympics are putting a lot of pressure on you, and I don’t blame you… but you’re here because you love gymnastics. It’s time to show the world just how much”

It took a moment for his words to fully sink in, but when they did, she broke into a somewhat relieved smile. Picking up her bag, she slung it over her shoulder.

“I will,” she said softly, getting a grin in return out of Nick. “I’ll make it the time of my life”

* * *

“Hey Will, are you coming to grab some dinner with us before we go to the arena?”

Poking his head around the bathroom door, Will found Jason looking expectantly towards him.

“Yeah, just give me a minute to get changed,” he said. Jason gave him a thumbs up, turning back towards his suitcase to search for something to wear.

Retreating back into the bathroom, Will quickly tugged his T-shirt over his head.

He didn’t know why he was always so unsure around JJ’s brother. Jason was a nice enough guy, with a tendency for light teasing every now and then. He was built like Michael, tall and burly, with a crop of dark blonde hair that had quite famously made him the teen heartthrob of his grade at East Allegheny High. Even with the tormenter he could be, he was fiercely protective of his family, but none more so than his little sister.

Well… actually, he did know why he was so jumpy. But this weekend wasn’t the time to think about that.

Will swallowed thickly, running a hand through his hair before turning and heading back out into the room.

“I’ve been thinking of getting Jayje some of her favourite candy for after the meet on Sunday, as like… a little celebration of ‘hey, the worst part is over’. Unfortunately, I’m a shit big brother, and I have no idea what she likes,” Jason mused.

“Jolly Ranchers,” Will blurted out. Jason looked up, cocking an eyebrow in confusion at his sister’s friend.

“Ok… thanks,” he said softly, breaking into a small grin before turning to look at the clothes piled on his bed. “Excited to watch Jayje compete tonight?”

Will hesitated slightly, shifting his weight to his other foot. “Yeah… I mean, Nationals last year was really fun, so this should be twice as good”

Jason gave him a friendly smile, tossing some of the clothes into his suitcase. “So, JJ never told us how you went with your college acceptances. Where did you end up deciding on?”

“I kinda suck at school… like, I do ok, but I’m no honour roll student, that’s for sure,” Will chuckled, the tension in his shoulders relaxing off as he spoke. “I did get accepted into a few out of state colleges, but in the end I decided on the University of Pittsburgh… I like it in Pittsburgh, so I wasn’t too keen about the idea of moving away”

“Fair enough,” Jason said with a nod, pulling his phone off the charger and shoving it in his pocket. “Do you know what you’re going to major in?”

“Probably criminology and justice… my end goal is to get accepted into the police force,” Will replied, a shy sort of smile crossing his face. “I’ve always admired the work my dad does… can’t see myself doing anything else”

Jason grinned. “Well, for what it’s worth Will, I reckon you’ll make a great cop one day. Not to mention, it gives a certain pull with the ladies”

Will chuckled as Jason led them towards the door of the hotel room.

“No-one in high school took your fancy, hey?” Jason asked as they stepped into the hall, pulling the door closed behind them. He glanced down at his phone. “Mom and Dad are waiting in the lobby”

“Ok,” Will said softly. “And… n-not really. I mean, I dated a couple a couple of the girls in our grade, but I never saw any of them going anywhere past high school. Maybe… maybe I’ll meet someone in college, who knows”

‘If only Jason knew who’s _really_ taken my fancy,’ he thought to himself as they strolled down the hall.

“Stay single man,” Jason replied, making him laugh. “I love Katie more than life itself, but she honestly does my absolute nut some days. Just stay single. You and your Xbox, that’s all you’ll ever need”

Laughing, Will shook his head as he shoved his hands into his pockets and followed Jason’s lead down to the lobby.

* * *

She’d been horrendously nervous when they’d walked out for the national anthem. Her hands had shook, her stomach had been aflutter with butterflies, but she had sucked it all up right before her first event, the floor exercise.

She wished she’d been able to start on beam, but as it was, that was where she was now standing to close her meet for the night. The arena was electric, the crowd more energized than ever, and it had made it so much easier for her to follow Nick’s advice about enjoying herself and performing her best. Her floor had been the best of her career, with high tumbles and clean landings that put her well in contention behind Aly on the event. She’d blocked harder than ever off the vault table and landed almost upright with a smile. And her bars, for some reason touted as being weak, had soared higher than she’d thought possible, scoring a strong score just below a mid 15 that had surely presented her as a strong case for the Olympic team.

She snapped back to the present moment just in time to see her green flag go up in the air. Plastering a smile on her face, she presented to the judges.

“Come on JJ, you got it!” she heard McKayla call from somewhere across the arena. Most of the other girls had finished for the night. She was one of the near to last gymnasts to go.

She took a deep breath, her custom, before running towards the springboard and punching hard from it.

“Oh!” Sandy gasped, grabbing Michael’s hand tightly as JJ’s feet hit the beam with a loud CRACK.

Michael chuckled, patting his wife’s arm. “She’s on, it’s alright”

Immediately executing her double spin, she finished it tightly, before turning back towards the end of the beam with a little choreography.

“I hate this part,” Sandy moaned as JJ lined herself up on the end of the beam.

Will watched, almost transfixed as JJ swung her arms back and then flipped easily across the beam. With a hard punch, she launched into a full twisting layout, landing it securely on the end.

He let out a breath he didn’t realize he’d been holding, clapping with the rest of the watching crowd. He had never seen her compete that move live. At Nationals the previous year, she had simply done a layout, out of nerves and being fresh off an injury.

Her choreography was clean, her leaps well extended. Her second flight series, two connected front aerials followed by a tricky little skill called an Onodi, left the audience captivated. Her switch ring leap brought forth an audible gasp, even from Will and Sandy.

To Sandy, it was breathtaking. Even though it was a skill she had seen JJ do many times in her career, it blew her away just how beautiful JJ made it look.

Nothing left but the dismount.

Her mind was clear, wholly focused on the task at hand. With a deep breath, she swung back, before leaping onto her hands. Flipping seamlessly down the length of the beam, she launched off the end into a high full twisting double tuck.

When she hit the mat at the end, she swore the arena was going to explode. Beaming from ear to ear, she saluted the judges again, before jogging over to the stairs where Nick was waiting.

“I think that was even better than when you won your world title,” he laughed, lifting her down from the podium and giving her a tight squeeze. “You competed well tonight kiddo, well done. Good work”

“Thanks,” she said happily. “I just followed your advice”

Nick grinned, leaving her side as the girls started to come up and congratulate her. “See, I’m always right!”

Rolling her eyes, JJ shook her head as she turned to accept a hug from Kennedy Baker.

“That was so good, I’m proud of you!” Aly gushed as she approached from her other side. Pulling away from Kennedy, JJ accepted a tight hug from her best friend.

“One more night… we got this,” Aly said softly, smiling widely as she squeezed JJ tightly.

It was in that moment that the nagging worry she’d had for the past few weeks drifted back into her mind.

What if they didn’t make the team? Or, even worse…

… what if Aly made the team, and she didn’t?

* * *

** TERMINOLOGY GUIDE **

_Onodi –_ from standing, the gymnast swings her arms as if she is going to do a back handspring. Jumping back, she executes a half twist before her hands touch the competition surface, turning the move into a forward skill. From there, she comes down onto one foot and stands up, as if out of a walkover. Named for Henrietta Onodi of Hungary, who competed at the 1992 and 1996 Olympic Games. She is the 1992 Olympic vault champion.

 _Switch ring leap_ – the gymnast propels forward. If she is a right leg leaper, her left leg swings forward first, before kicking backwards. At the same time, she drives her right leg up into the air and throws her head back. Her back leg is bent at the knee. The name ‘ring’ derives from the shape created by the release of the leg and head. Difficult to perform on the balance beam as it requires loss of sight of the beam.


	6. Chapter 6

Every muscle in her body seemed to contain a dull ache after two more training sessions to round out her Saturday. She’d worked herself to the grindstone, determined to bring out her absolute best for the final night of the selection process.

Because of that, she found herself in the recovery room at the hotel after training, her legs strapped into the NormaTec recovery boots as she lay quietly in her chair.

Over to her left, Kennedy Baker was having a well deserved massage to loosen up all her sore muscles, while Jordyn lay across the room on another table, having an achy calf worked on by the national team doctor, Larry Nassar. The chair to her right was occupied by Gabby, who looked like she was having a nap while the NormaTec boots did their work. The room around her was abuzz with activity, what with all the girls in various stages of post training recovery, but it felt surprisingly calm.

“Hey,” Aly said softly as she approached, kneeling down beside JJ’s chair. JJ lazily turned her head towards her, making Aly giggle. “They’ve got you on the good stuff hey?”

“I think I love NormaTec,” JJ whispered, making Aly laugh.

“And I love Deep Heat,” Aly replied, wincing as she bumped her knees against the chair. Aly had had a rough week. Almost every time JJ had watched her in practice, she had landed on her knees. They were raw and bruised, and she knew Aly would just be glad when the whole thing was over so she could stop stressing herself out.

“McKayla and I are gonna have a chill night in our room, watch some movies. Come find us when you’re out of physical, ok?” Aly said. JJ nodded, watching as her friend got up and headed back out of the room.

As she watched her retreating back, the nagging sense of dread started to settle in her stomach again.

Half an hour later, she was walking out of the physical therapy room, Kennedy at her side.

“You ok JJ?” Kennedy asked as they headed for the elevators. “You’ve been pretty quiet all day”

JJ nodded, clenching her fists tightly as Kennedy reached out and pressed the ‘up’ arrow. Her stomach was nothing more than an angry ball of nerves, and no amount of willing it away was taking away the sickening sense of dread.

“Just nervous,” she muttered, keeping her eyes cast down at the floor. A ‘ding’ sounded to their right, the doors of the elevator sliding open to allow them in. They stepped in, Kennedy pressing the button for their floor as the doors slid closed again.

“Aren’t you nervous?” JJ asked quietly, turning to look at Kennedy as the elevator began to trundle up to their floor.

Kennedy let out a laugh. “No. I know I’m not going to London, about eight of you would have to be paralyzed before I would make the Olympic team. Not that I’m wishing that on any of you, I swear. But no, I’m not nervous, because there’s no pressure for me. I’m not making the team, and that’s ok. I’m going through this Trials process because it’s an experience for me… and one day I’ll be able to tell my kids I competed at the Olympic Trials”

JJ managed a smile as Kennedy grinned at her. For a moment, she envied her teammate. What she would give to be here with no nerves, no pressure, no constant stomach churning.

“I’m rooting for you though,” Kennedy said quietly as the elevator came to a stop on their floor and the doors creaked apart. “I know you’re nervous, which is ok, but I think you can do it, JJ”

Biting her lip, JJ shot Kennedy an anxious smile, following her out into the hallway. Seeing as their rooms were in opposite directions, they bid goodbyes.

Somehow, she felt worse than before.

Unlocking the hotel room, she entered to an empty room. Assuming Aly and McKayla had gone in search of snacks, she bundled herself into the bathroom, pulling her phone out of her pocket as she closed the door behind her and fell back against it.

* * *

“I’m standing on the wing of this aircraft, having just rebuilt an entire panel, and I’ve put all fifty six rivets back into the top surface panel… or, I thought I had, because I still had two rivets in my hand,” Jason said animatedly.

They were sitting in _il’ Pomodori_ , a small but cozy Italian restaurant that Sandy had stumbled across that afternoon while scouring the nearby shopping districts with her mother, Nancy. Since being served their food just minutes earlier, they had quickly discovered it was delicious.

“What did you do next?” Michael laughed.

“Started pulling the rivets back out like a madman of course!” Jason exclaimed, sending the whole table into a fit of laughter. “If you’re working on a plane and you end up with extra bolts in your hand, you better bloody find out where they came from!”

The laughter was permeated by the sound of Sandy’s phone ringing from her handbag. Ducking down, she immediately grabbed it from the top of her bag, frowning when she saw JJ’s name lighting up the screen. Answering it, she pressed it to her ear, turning her body towards the back of her chair as the conversation continued at the table.

“Hey sweetie, what’s going on?”

_“Are you busy?”_

Sandy frowned. JJ sounded upset.

“We’re out for dinner, but it’s ok, I can talk,” she said gently, rising from her chair and walking towards the front of the restaurant, shooting Michael a reassuring smile as he watched her worriedly. Pushing on the door, she let herself out into the warm summer night, walking down the sidewalk a little way before taking a seat on the little limestone wall.

_“Mom, I’m so nervous”_

Sandy’s heart gave a painful tug as she listened to the anxiety coursing through her daughter’s voice. This journey was harder than anyone could imagine. It was rewarding, and incredible, and one that JJ had chosen for herself… but at the same time, it was also demanding, relentless, and at times, unforgiving.

“I would be surprised if you weren’t, my girl,” Sandy said softly, trying to keep her voice even and soothing, even though all she wanted to do was run to the team hotel, gather JJ in her arms and hold her tight. Her daughter was strong and talented… but she was also shy, and innocent, and at times, so filled with self doubt that Sandy wondered how she ever saw herself succeeding.

 _“My stomach hurts,”_ JJ said tearfully, sniffing back tears on the other end of the line. _“It’s been hurting all week, and I know it’s because I’m worried… I just can’t make it go away”_

“JJ, you’re going to be alright,” Sandy breathed. Hearing JJ in tears made it all that much harder for her to keep her composure. “You’re going to be alright. You looked incredible last night… like you were enjoying every minute of performing”

 _“But every minute when I’m not performing is just a constant ‘what if’,”_ JJ rebutted.

“You know very well that you can’t do that. All you can control is the gymnastics you perform”

Silence hung on the line, the air between them seeming to buzz as she waited for JJ to speak again.

And then, a sniff sounded out, followed by a choked sob.

_“Mom, I don’t think I’m going to make this team”_

Biting her lip hard to prevent herself from bursting into tears at JJ’s terrified proclamation, Sandy hung her head, taking a deep breath as she tried to work out what to say next.

She jumped slightly when a strong arm dropped lightly around her shoulders. Recognizing Michael’s cologne, she leaned into his embrace, feeling much more relaxed in her husband’s presence.

“Why do you think that?” she asked gently.

_“Because the other girls… they’re just better… stronger… Mom, Aly’s going to end up going to London and I’m going to be staying home”_

“And you know something JJ? If that happens… you’ll be ok,” Sandy said gently. “It’ll suck and you’ll be sad and upset about it… but you’ll be ok. This, right now, is one small notch amongst everything you’re going to do with your life, and it does not define you or who you are. You are still the sweet, gold hearted, good natured girl I raised you to be, and nothing is going to change that”

JJ let out a quiet sob, her mother’s words sinking deeper than Sandy had surely expected them to.

“I know you’re nervous… I know you’re probably a little scared, which is ok! How many seventeen year old girls can say they’ve competed at the Olympic Trials? But through all this worry, I want you to remember that we love you, and we support you, and we believe in you. Ok, my girl?”

 _“Ok,”_ came JJ’s tearful whisper from the other end.

“I’m going to pass you over to your dad, ok? He wants to talk to you”

Getting JJ’s agreement, she passed the phone over to Michael, stretching up to press a kiss to his cheek before starting to head back inside.

“Hey Jaybird, you having a rough night?” she heard Michael say as she pulled open the door and re-entered the restaurant.

“Everything ok?” Jason asked as she approached the table.

“Yeah,” she sighed, walking around to her chair and pulling it out. “JJ’s having a bit of a crisis of confidence. I think she’s ok… she’s just a bit upset”

They returned to their meals, Michael rejoining them nearly ten minutes later, wearing a reassuring smile.

“She’s ok,” he said softly, handing Sandy back her phone as he took his seat again. “She just doubts herself too much. I told her not to worry about scores or teams, just to go out and do what she’s been training with Nick. At that point, Aly came in and found her, so she’s gone to watch a movie with her and McKayla”

Sandy smiled gratefully. Since Aly and JJ had met at the age of 10 in the Talent Opportunity Program, Aly had always been a wonderful friend. Not only were she and JJ thick as thieves, but Aly was always looking out for her, and Sandy knew JJ did the same for Aly.

For a moment, Sandy wondered if Aly’s mother, Lynn, had received any similar phone calls throughout the week, but then she shook it off.

It was better not to dwell on the nerves. Tomorrow night, the worst would be over.

And then they would deal with whatever came next.


	7. Chapter 7

“We’ve worked hard on your bars this year, and they looked brilliant in training this morning. Just remember the corrections I gave you, but most importantly, just remember to let the routine flow. If you have to break a connection to save a mistake, just do it. Just do exactly what you did in training and you’ll be fine”

Nick’s words were meeting her ears but they weren’t truly sinking in. All around her, the hustle and bustle of the arena as the competition continued on seemed to be in overdrive, every sound magnified as it came screaming to her ears.

Closing her eyes, she took a deep breath, squeezing her hands tightly around the dowels of her grips.

“Nick,” she said softly, interrupting him as he rambled on beside her. He stopped, looking down at her as she opened her eyes and turned to look at him.

“Yeah?” he replied.

“You’re kinda stressing me out,” she admitted.

“Oh,” Nick said lamely, his shoulders seeming to relax slightly. “Sorry”

“It’s ok,” she said with a small smile. Glancing down at her hands, she toyed with the buckle of her grip. “I’m just… I don’t know. I’m nervous… but I’d say nervous is actually an understatement”

Nick gave her a reassuring smile. “I know. But you can’t be so hard on yourself, JJ, you know that. You’re so much better than you think you are… the moment you first realize that, everything will suddenly seem less terrifying for you”

Looking up, JJ realized that Sarah Finnegan, the girl competing before her, was coming down the stairs. With a heavy sigh, she walked towards the steps, giving Sarah a smile as she passed her.

Preparing the bars went by in a blur, and before she knew exactly what was going on, she was standing beneath the bars, lifting her arms into the air to salute the judges.

As she turned to face the low bar, her surroundings seemed to blur. The bright stadium lights above her seemed to burn into her retinas as she narrowed her focus down onto the bar in front of her.

Breathing in deeply, she shut out everything around her, swung her arms forward, and mounted the bar.

Keeping everything tight, she cast up to handstand, extending from her hands all the way up to her toes as she brought her toes down to the bar and swung beneath it. A full turn on top of the bar at the conclusion of the skill made it a toe-on full, before she brought her feet down to the bar through another swing, flicking her body up towards the high bar as she reached the top again.

Casting up to handstand, she swung through a backward giant, releasing into a soaring straddled Tkatchev, which she caught and then immediately released into a Pak salto. Catching the Pak with ease, she circled around the bar again, this time with her legs held in a tight straddle, before releasing again and executing a half turn as she caught the bar.

Pulling up to handstand, she swung through two strong backward giants, winding up before releasing into a stretched and flighty double layout.

When her feet hit the mat with a satisfying THWACK, she was smiling from ear to ear. Even though she wasn’t one of the big names in the meet, like Aly, Jordyn, and Gabby, the crowd went wild as she straightened up and saluted the judges.

Heading back over towards Nick, she couldn’t help but notice how one killer routine had dissipated the knot of anxiety in her stomach. Still grinning from ear to ear, she slapped her hands against Nick’s, before getting a tight hug.

“My rambling worked obviously,” he teased lightly, making her laugh. “Alright. One more routine and then you can breathe kiddo. Let’s go”

* * *

She’d finished her night as the final competitor on beam, getting a raucous round of applause from the crowd. Once her physical competition was over, a wave of relief had washed over like a wall of water. But then, just as quickly as they had disappeared, the nerves and anxiety had reared their ugly heads. Because while the physical demands were over, now came the anxious wait. At the end of the wait, she would either be riding on the high of a dream come true, or trying to keep it together after her dreams were broken.

Chewing anxiously on her lip, she’d joined the girls as they were led out of the competition area and into a room in the depths of the building. Ahead of them, the selection committee, comprised of Martha Karolyi, former Olympic coach Steve Rybacki, and athlete representative Terin Humphrey, had been led into a conference room further down the hall.

The tense 12 minute wait had led the arena to a state of nervous chatter, in the midst of which sat JJ’s family. They had sat in near total silence for almost the entire time, until Nancy spoke up as the timer ticked down to the three minute mark.

“She did so well tonight… I think that’s almost the best I’ve ever seen her do”

Sandy let out a breath she didn’t realize she had been holding, clutching tightly to her husband’s hand as she glanced over at her mother.

“I just hope she remembers that if…,” she said softly, her voice trailing off as she avoided voicing the worst case scenario.

Closing her eyes, she tipped her head back slightly and took a deep breath.

She’d put JJ in gymnastics at four years old. JJ had been fascinated with the sport after seeing the 1998 National Championships on TV, and fearing her youngest child would injure herself if she continued trying to replicate what she had seen on the TV, Sandy had walked her into Romero’s Gymnastics Academy and signed her up.

What had started as a fun after school activity had led to a genuine passion and motivation to go far. JJ had decided after the Sydney Olympics that going to the Olympics was her ultimate goal, a dream that was further solidified when she had watched Carly Patterson win gold four years later in Athens.

It had never been Sandy and Michael’s dream. Proud parents and supporters, they had been there to support and encourage her as she got herself this far. And now, they were just minutes away from finding out if it had all paid off. All the vacations they’d missed, the birthday parties JJ had never had, the injuries, the time away from friends and family, everything their daughter had given up had been for the pursuit of one thing.

An Olympic team berth.

Around her, the arena’s noise level was rising. The timer surely had to be almost done.

“Sandy,” Michael said softly, squeezing her hand to pull her from her reverie. “They’re about to announce it”

Snapping her eyes open, Sandy sat up straighter in her chair as her eyes fell to the floor, where a man she recognized as Steve Penny, the president of USA Gymnastics, was walking out onto the carpet. After a short delay, during which he tested his microphone, and spoke quickly with the organizers around him, he lifted his attention to the cheering crowd.

“Good evening,” he said, generating an excited rise in the volume. Sandy’s eyes were already burning with tears, both of her hands wrapped tightly around Michael’s as she fought for her composure. Over to her left, Nancy was squeezing Jason’s hand, and Jason, for the first time Sandy could remember, looked nearly beside himself.

“Please welcome, the five members, of the women’s 2012 U.S. Olympic team!” he cried, glancing quickly down at a sheet of paper in his hand. “Gabby Douglas!”

The cheers began to turn into screams, while Sandy’s stomach churned relentlessly.

“Jennifer Jareau!”

“Oh my god, MICHAEL!” Sandy shrieked, bursting into tears as she and Michael leapt out of their seats and threw their arms around each other. Jason and Will both leapt up simultaneously, punching the air in excitement as Nancy let out an excited shriek.

“McKayla Maroney!”

“She did it Sandy… our baby girl is going to the Olympics,” Michael said tearfully, clutching his wife as the applause began to reach deafening levels of volume.

“Aly Raisman!”

Sandy let out another sob as Aly’s name hit their ears. Somewhere in the crowd, Aly’s parents, Lynn and Rick, would now be sharing a similar embrace. JJ would be going to the Olympics with her best friend at her side.

“And Kyla Ross!”

A collective gasp rang around the arena that didn’t go unnoticed by Sandy as she and Michael pulled apart, both wiping tears from their eyes. Of the five names called, one of them hadn’t been Jordyn Wieber’s; the reigning national and World all-around champion.

It seemed to take forever, but finally, the doors to the conference rooms opened and out came the five girls, each clutching a bunch of flowers, each of them in near hysterical tears of joy.

JJ’s hands were shaking in total disbelief, but even that couldn’t stop the tears cascading down her cheeks as she ascended the steps to stand atop the floor with four of her closest friends, now her Olympic teammates.

“They will be joined in London by three replacement athletes! Jordyn Wieber, Sarah Finnegan, and Elizabeth Price!”

So overcome with emotion that she hardly noticed when the three alternates joined them, JJ followed Gabby and McKayla’s lead as they all lifted their hands into the air and waved to the crowd, who by now were screaming and cheering so loudly, she was sure they could be heard in London.

She couldn’t believe it. A lifelong dream had now become a reality.

She was going to the Olympics.

* * *

Still overcome with tears, but smiling her way through them, JJ had survived through her media appearances in the foyer, before the girls were finally released to go and find their families.

Still dressed in just her team warm-ups and her socks, she darted between the throngs of people in the foyer, smiling her thanks when the other girls who had competed stopped her to congratulate her.

But finally, she’d spotted her family, and the second she saw her mom, the tears came in at full force again.

“I did it,” was all she managed to say as she threw her arms around her mom and buried her face in her shoulder. “I can’t believe it”

“We are so proud of you,” Sandy said tearfully, rocking JJ ever so slightly from side to side as she smoothed JJ’s ponytail down soothingly. “You were incredible… you’ve worked so hard… you _deserve_ this, and you’re going to have the time of your life”

Still sobbing, JJ managed a smile as she pulled away, before she was immediately swept up in a warm, loving hug from her dad.

“Everything your mom said… I love you so much Jaybird, I’m so proud of you”

After also getting tight hugs from her grandmother and Jason, she finally reached Will, who’d been waiting off to the side to allow her a moment with her family.

“I’m starting to think you’re just looking for more and more ways to outshine me,” he said with a lopsided grin. She let out a watery laugh, moving in for a hug as he wrapped his arms around her and held her tight.

The tears had slowed, and for the first time, she noticed how good he smelled. Whatever cologne he was wearing, it suited him.

Suddenly aware that they’d been standing together for longer than was usually necessary, she pulled away, a shy smile crossing her face as she looked up at him. He gave her a sheepish grin, clearing his throat as he took half a step back.

“You… you were amazing Jayje. I can’t wait to watch you compete in London,” he said quickly.

“Thanks,” JJ said softly, smiling as she turned back to look at her family.

As they started to walk back towards the room where they could spend some more time together with the other girls and their families, her mom gave her a curious look.

“Shut up,” JJ muttered, making Sandy chuckle.

“I didn’t say anything,” she murmured, looping an arm around JJ’s shoulders and pressing a kiss to the top of her head. She let out a happy sigh, holding JJ tight.

“I’m so proud of you, baby girl”

* * *

** TERMINOLOGY GUIDE **

_Toe-on full –_ from a handstand atop the bar, the gymnast brings her legs down through a pike position. Her toes touch the bar between her hands as she swing around the bar, before going back up to handstand at the completion of the rotation.

 _Maloney (the skill JJ performed after the toe-on full) –_ technically named a toe-on Shaposhnikova. Bringing her toes to the bar like above, the gymnast circles around the bar, before releasing and transitioning up to the high bar with a stretched body position. She catches still facing the low bar. Named for Kristen Maloney of the United States of America, who competed at the 2000 Sydney Olympic Games and won a bronze medal as part of the American team.

 _Pak salto_ – facing the low bar, the gymnast swings forward and releases the bar, performing a single layout back salto between the bars before catching the low bar. Named for Gyong Sil Pak of North Korea.

 _Double layout (uneven bars dismount)_ – from a backward giant, the gymnast releases the bar and completes two stretched flips before landing on her feet.


	8. Chapter 8

Covered in sweat, chalk, foam dust and god knows what else, JJ felt incredibly relaxed as she came to rest on the floor at the conclusion of her Wednesday training, her first day back since the conclusion of the Olympic Trials.

Shrouded in the warm dusty air of the gym, she felt more secure than she had all year.

Here, it was like she’d never left. In the week she’d been gone, everything had changed, and at the same time, nothing.

Sitting on the edge of the floor, she gazed around the gym that was like a second home to her as she gently stretched out her hard worked muscles. Everything was exactly as it had been the previous Saturday morning… but it felt like so much had changed at the same time. The posters detailing her success at the national and world level still hung in the same places on the wall, the banners bearing the logos of Olympics past stretched across the bricks beneath them. The banner bearing the words **LONDON 2012** hung at the very end, a recent addition of only a few months. But now, looking at it, it sent a thrill of excitement racing through her chest.

She was going to the Olympics. A dream she’d clutched tightly to since she was only six years old. A dream she and her family had made thousands of sacrifices for to have even the slightest chance of achieving it. And here she was. One of the miniscule percentage who actually made it.

Running her hands along the tops of her legs and all the way down to her toes, she glanced up at the sound of the cover of a foam block rustling. For the first time, she noticed Nick sitting on one of the blocks by the edge of the floor. He had a much calmer expression than he usually wore… in fact, he almost looked a tad emotional.

“Are you happy with how you trained today?” he asked when he noticed her watching him across the gym. She broke into a smile.

“Yeah,” she said, her voice coming out in an excited, breathless whisper. “Everything felt really good”

“You seem like you have a bit more energy today than usual,” Nick chuckled. “Unsurprisingly”

Relaxing out of her stretch, JJ pulled herself to her feet, picking up her grips bag and her water bottle. She slowly made her way over to her coach, coming to a stop a few feet away from him.

“You know Jayje… I’m really proud of you kiddo,” Nick said, a warm smile crossing his face. “You’re my first elite… my first national team member… national champion, world champion… now you’re an Olympian, and it just… it makes me so proud, you’ve worked so hard… I’m very grateful that you and your family trusted me to get you this far”

JJ swallowed hard, her coach’s sweet words stirring up all the emotion from Sunday evening once more.

“Still got a way to go,” she reminded him with a smile. He chuckled, nodding as he pulled himself to his feet.

“We’ll enjoy it as it comes. In the meantime… you better head home and get ready for that party your mom’s throwing you,” he teased lightly as they walked back in the direction of the locker rooms. JJ threw her head back, letting out a groan as Nick laughed.

“Just what I want… to be the center of attention,” she muttered.

“Only for a few hours… and think about it. It’s only like… fifty people. The Olympics will be more like… fifteen thousand,” Nick said in a mock whisper.

“Don’t tell me that,” JJ whispered back, cutting in front of Nick before darting into the change rooms, both of them grinning from ear to ear. As she pushed open the change room door, she heard Nick chuckle to himself, before heading back in the direction of the offices.

* * *

The ‘small’ get together her mother had promised had turned out to be a little bigger than she had anticipated. Her grandmother, affectionately nicknamed Nandy, her mom’s sister and her two cousins who lived in the States had all driven in to help celebrate. Joining them were most of her friends from school, Will’s parents, as well as the majority of the older girls from the gym. Rounding out the fairly large group were Nick and Tash, and two other coaches from the gym, Elliott and Liam.

“This is a lot of people,” JJ muttered as she walked outside alongside her mom.

“A lot of people wanted to celebrate with you,” Sandy chuckled.

Before JJ could speak again, the gathered group in the backyard seemed to realise she had graced them with her presence. Breaking into a round of cheers, they started to approach her as she fought off the tomato red blush creeping up her cheeks.

Nearly twenty minutes later, after she’d made her way around and spoken to most of her friends and family, she was just heading back towards her school friends when someone yelled her name across the yard.

“JJ!”

JJ whipped around at the sound of the familiar voice, only to be almost knocked off her feet by a flurry of denim shorts and wavy brown hair.

“Lani!” she laughed, staggering back to catch herself as she threw her arms around her friend. Alanis, or as she steadfastly insisted on being called, Lani, was JJ’s oldest friend apart from Will. The two of them had gone to school together since their kindergarten days, and despite the fact that their personalities couldn’t be more opposite at times, JJ loved having Lani in her life. She was just the kind of upbeat, crazy friend that every self proclaimed introvert needed in their life.

“We all got together at my place to watch you compete, you were amazing! I can’t believe you’re actually going to London,” Lani gushed, pulling back and grinning excitedly. “I’m gonna host a watch party”

JJ laughed, looping an arm around Lani’s back as they walked across the backyard to where her other school friends were waiting. She could see the familiar faces of Tessa, Brenner, Mackenzie, and Clayton sitting around one of the tables that had been set up. Will was hovering behind the table, talking with his friend Matthew, but his attention seemed divided as JJ approached the table.

“There she is, the star pupil of East Allegheny!” Clayton called as they walked over. JJ blushed, unable to fight off the grin that found its way onto her face. Pulling out a chair, she dropped down between Tessa and Brenner, Lani sashaying around the table and finding herself a place on Clayton’s lap. Clayton playfully slapped her ass, sending the group up in a fit of laughter while Lani rolled her eyes at her boyfriend.

“Just trying to show us all up hey?” Brenner teased. JJ stuck her tongue out at her friend, leaning forward and grabbing a pretzel from the bowl on the table.

“Always,” she shot back, grinning.

“You were so good Jayje, honestly, when they called your name, I was crying almost as hard as you were,” Tessa gushed.

“No word of a lie, girl went through like half a box of tissues,” Lani teased.

“I was proud, it was a proud moment!” Tessa exclaimed, throwing her arms around JJ as they laughed.

Someone tapped on JJ’s upper arm, pulling her attention away. Seeing Will’s smiling face, she extricated herself from Tessa’s hold and stood up again.

“Can I talk to you? Alone?” he asked softly. She nodded, stepping around the chair and following him back towards the house. Clayton let out a wolf whistle, prompting Will to turn and flip him off while their friends laughed again.

Once they were inside, JJ followed Will into the dining room, where he stopped and stood somewhat anxiously by the table.

“What’s up?” she asked softly, watching as he shoved his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

“I... I just wanted to tell you... how amazing you were at Trials. I’m so glad you made the team,” he said warmly, a handsome smile crossing his face. “I have to admit, it’s pretty amazing to watch your best friend make her dreams come true”

JJ blushed, an abashed smile finding its way onto her face. “Thanks Will”

He shifted his weight nervously from one foot to the other, lifting one of his hands and running it through his hair. Lifting his gaze, his eyes met JJ’s, and for the first time, she noticed the intensity shining beneath them.

She was surprised to feel the tiniest flutter in her stomach from the way he was looking at her, but she just as quickly brushed it off. He was her best friend… as close as they were, their friendship hadn’t experienced a moment like this before, a moment as emotional and intense as her finally achieving her lifelong dream. He was proud… she could see it in his face.

“JJ! Can you come outside?”

Her father’s voice made her whip around, smiling at her dad as he leant through the back door.

“Yeah, I’m coming,” she called back, looking back towards Will. “Were you going to say something?”

He swallowed hard. “I… yeah, but don’t worry… I’ll catch you later,” he said softly, giving her a soft smile as he started to head towards the door. He brushed her upper arm gently, stirring up the butterflies once more.

Shaking it off, JJ followed him back out of the house, walking towards where her dad was standing at the edge of the deck, an arm cast out towards her. The attention of all their guests was fixed on her parents, and she could already feel a blush creeping up her cheeks. Forcing herself to smile through it, she came to a stop at her dad’s side, his arm settling around her shoulders.

“Now that I have your attention… Sandy and I just wanted to thank you all for coming tonight and helping us celebrate what is truly an _amazing_ achievement for our family,” Michael started, looking down at JJ with a warm smile before lifting his gaze and attention back to their guests. “All of you have known JJ from some point in her life, whether it was from the day she was born, or your first day of school, or from Nick’s gym, but surely throughout all the time you’ve all known her, you’ve known her endless passion and dedication to the sport of gymnastics. Since she decided… at the ripe old age of six nonetheless… that she was going to the Olympics, all we have known was for JJ to chase that dream like it was all that mattered in the world. And it’s been a difficult two years, but she’s finally made it… she’s one of the five best gymnasts in the country, and she will be representing the United States at the Olympic Games in a couple of weeks, and we are _so goddamn proud_!”

Everyone erupted into a round of applause, making JJ grin helplessly as Michael tightened his grip on her shoulders.

“So I just wanted to say thank you. All of you. Whether it’s in a big or a small way, all of you have had some hand in supporting JJ on this journey. Our biggest thanks, of course, has to go to her wonderful coach, Nick, without whom, JJ may not have made it this far”

Nick lifted a hand in appreciation as JJ’s friends and family clapped around him.

“We can’t wait to see what JJ’s going to achieve in London, but no matter what happens, we’ll be proud of her. And we hope you’ll all tune in, if you’re not travelling with us! July twenty ninth is the first day of women’s competition, so make sure you hit up NBC!”

More applause filled their backyard as JJ turned and hugged her dad tightly.

“I know I’ve said it a million times, but I’m so proud of you baby girl, I love you so much,” Michael murmured in her ear, making her smile as she pulled away and turned to her mom. Sandy wrapped her in a loving hug, everything she wanted to say being said in that one simple action. When she pulled away, she pressed a kiss to JJ’s forehead, smiling warmly at her before they turned and rejoined the party.

“Hey,” she called out as she spotted Will heading back towards their friends. “Didn’t you want to tell me something?”

“Oh, yeah,” he chuckled as he turned around. “It’s alright. It wasn’t important. Just… remember that you killed it at Trials… and you’re gonna kill it in London. I’m proud of you”

Breaking into an abashed smile, JJ was a little surprised.

“Well… thanks Will. It… that means a lot”

* * *

Hours later, JJ knew she should’ve been sleeping. After all, she had training early in the morning, and training tired was one of her least favourite ways to spend her days.

But in the darkness of her bedroom, the moonlight illuminating her half packed bag for camp sitting on her chair, she couldn’t switch off her mind. For once though, her thoughts weren’t focused on how nervous she was about the upcoming preparations for the Games.

Tonight, her thoughts were on Rosaline.

It had been seven long years since her older sister had committed suicide, and still, it felt like she could walk through the door at any moment.

JJ’s heart pounded in her chest as her thoughts wandered back to the morning she’d found her sister’s lifeless body in the bathtub, covered in blood and ghostly pale. That same evening, London had been announced as the host for the 2012 Olympic Games. ‘Her’ Games, as she had called them for many years.

“Hey, why are you still awake?”

Turning her head towards the door, JJ sat up as her mom slipped into the room.

“Can’t sleep?”

JJ started to shake her head, but seconds later, the tears had risen like a tidal wave and bubbled over, flooding down her cheeks as Sandy closed the gap between them and pulled JJ into her arms.

“What’s wrong?” she asked softly, smoothing JJ’s hair down as she held her tightly.

“Ros,” JJ croaked.

Sandy’s heavy sigh told JJ that some of her feelings about her deceased sister were definitely shared by her mother.

“I miss her too,” she breathed, pressing a lingering kiss to the top of JJ’s head. “I miss her too, baby”

“I wish she could be here… to watch me at the Olympics,” JJ stammered, pulling away slightly and lifting her tear stained gaze up towards her mother. “Do you think she’d be proud of me?”

“Of course she would,” Sandy whispered, wiping a few tears from JJ’s cheeks. “She would be thrilled that you’ve made the team”

Leaning back into her mother’s embrace, JJ sniffed, wiping her eyes on the back of her hand as Sandy rocked them back and forth ever so slightly.

She would make her sister proud at the Olympics. She wasn’t just competing for the United States, or her family… she was competing for Rosaline too.


	9. Chapter 9

**_gymmie2012: honestly don’t understand why Martha chose JJ over Jordyn._ **

**_flyhigh: fuming that they left the reigning AA champ at home for a glorified beam specialist_ **

**_jtluher82: who knew being the visual representation of a rich American teenager could buy your way onto an Olympic team?_ **

The comments had been rolling through her Twitter feed with such ferocity that by the time she was nearly due to leave for camp, she had disabled all notifications and completely ignored the app altogether.

But curiosity had got the better of her. And that was how she found herself where she was sitting now.

Trawling through the depths of the online gymnastics community, wondering what else people had to say about her inclusion on the Olympic team, she was the internet’s equivalent of being neck deep in her search. Her Tumblr tag had been close to the worst, unearthing an abundance of fans who were clearly less than impressed that she was on the team.

**_tkatchevmeifyoucan – so let’s review the wack decisions Martha made with the team. She left JORDYN FUCKING WIEBER, the REIGNING WORLD AA CHAMPION, off the team in favour of Jennifer Jareau… the world’s most glorified beam specialist. And don’t even try to argue with me that it wasn’t JJ who replaced Jordyn because it absolutely was, and let me explain why. Gabby and Aly were always going as all-arounders. Kyla and McKayla are not going to be used as all-arounders in any sense of the word, so that leaves JJ as the third all-arounder. A spot which SHOULD have been Jordyn’s. I’m fuming. Fuming. JJ might be a good gymnast but Martha is delusional if she thinks she can outscore Jordyn as an all-arounder, she couldn’t even outscore her at Nationals! If they fall short of team gold, I’m absolutely pinning it on this decision._ **

**_mustys-eyeshadow – sorry not sorry but I’m never going to stop being angry that JJ is going to the Olympics instead of Jordyn_ **

**_gigigienger – all JJ is good for on that team is being eye candy. Let’s be real, most guys watching the Games are only going to be thinking about bending her over a balance beam, not what she can do on it_ **

Slamming her laptop shut, she squeezed her eyes closed. Her stomach was churning, mostly with anxiety. As if by their own accord, her hands curled into tightly clenched fists.

Where did people get off thinking they could talk about her like that? She clenched her jaw tightly, trying to force the image of the words out of her brain. _‘…only going to be thinking about bending her over a balance beam…’._ What sort of disgusting comment even was that? She wasn’t some sex object… the fact that people would even think of her like that made her stomach roll terribly. Even if she was sexually active… that was her business. No-one else’s.

Did people really hate her that much? Was she going to go to the Olympics as the most hated member of the U.S. Olympic Team? Had Martha actually made the right decision? Surely she was going to change her mind at the camp and put Jordyn on the team.

“JJ! If you want a ride to training, we need to leave now!” her mother called from downstairs, breaking her from her rage filled train of thought. Swallowing hard, she took a deep breath, before hopping up from her desk chair and grabbing her gym bag off the floor.

“Coming!”

* * *

She flipped seamlessly across the beam, her feet making a resounding thud with every impact. Punching hard out of her second flip, she whipped her shoulders around for a full twist… but when her feet came down miles away from the surface of the beam, her heart leapt into her throat.

Seconds later she was lying on her back beneath the beam, staring up at the ceiling as she rubbed her elbow. It had happened so quickly that she didn’t register hitting it on the apparatus, but judging by how much it was hurting right now, she knew she must have.

“I hope you don’t do that at the Olympics,” Nick teased lightly from a few feet away where he was leaning on a stack of foam blocks.

Almost immediately, her somewhat dazed expression was replaced with irritation as she pulled herself to her feet. Without a word or even a second glance at Nick, she pulled herself back up onto the beam.

“Do it again, remember to visualize the line of the beam and keep your body over it,” Nick instructed calmly.

“I know,” JJ snapped back. She took no notice of the surprised expression that crossed Nick’s face, but he just as quickly shook it off.

She swung down, launching herself backwards again. This time, she managed to land the skill on top of the beam, however, not without a huge balance check.

“Stop doubting yourself on every landing. You were right on there and then you second guessed yourself. Just hammer it home,” Nick called out encouragingly.

“I’m trying!” JJ said angrily. Nick frowned, clearly not appreciating her tone, but for the moment, he stayed quiet.

She walked back to the end of the beam, setting herself up to try it one more time. When her feet were set, she lifted her arms over her head before swinging them back. Her flips were strong, and the layout full landed much cleaner than the last attempt.

“Much better,” Nick said with a clap, pushing off the blocks. “Let’s move to bars”

Huffing in frustration, JJ jumped down from the beam, swiping her grips bag off the floor and following Nick as he strode across the carpeted floor to the uneven bars.

“Get your grips on and I’ll start chalking for you,” he called over his shoulder. JJ scowled, sitting down at the edge of the floor and ripping her grips out of their canvas bag, an action which didn’t go unnoticed by Nick.

“What’s up with you kiddo? Someone steal your happy pills?” Nick called from the bars, some sort of a grin gracing his face. JJ rolled her eyes, rolling prewrap around her wrists to protect them from chaffing.

“JJ, I get maybe today’s just a crappy day, but you were fine this morning, so I’d appreciate it if you would drop the attitude,” Nick said, his voice much firmer than before.

“I don’t want to do bars today,” she grumbled, throwing her grips bag aside when it got in the way of her prep.

“Funnily enough, they’re not my favourite to work with you on either because you tend to land on top of me a lot, but it’s tough luck because you’re going to be in the team final lineup and I really need you to just stay on,” Nick said, lightening his tone again in an attempt to win her over.

“Well they can put Aly up seeing as she’s a better all-arounder than me anyway!” JJ spat.

“What are you… you know what, never mind,” Nick said in exasperation, throwing the block of chalk he was using back into the bucket. “I’m not in the mood to deal with this crap today JJ, so I’m going to go to the office and do something more productive while you sit out here and get this ten year old tantrum out of your system. When you’re ready to behave like a seventeen year old and cooperate with me, you can come and get me”

JJ watched through a scowl as he stalked back across the floor towards the foyer. When the slam of the office door rang through the building, she turned back to face the bars.

She wasn’t really angry at Nick. How could she be mad at the man who was perpetually in a good mood every morning when he walked into the gym? But the comments from earlier had stung deeper than she’d expected, and the self doubt and frustration had crept back in. She hadn’t meant to take it out on him, but somehow… that was what had happened.

Heaving a sigh, she slowly pulled her sweatbands onto her wrists, settling them into place. Once she was happy with them, she pulled her grips on one at a time, buckling them securely around her wrists.

It took a few more minutes before she had them ready to practice, but as she looked up at the bars, her shoulders sagged in defeat.

She didn’t want to get up and do anything. But she also didn’t want to go and get Nick from the office… her pride was too much for that. She knew she owed him an apology, but it could come later.

She sat there for a few minutes, her face resting in a sulky frown, before she finally got to her feet and walked over to the apparatus. A glance up told her Nick had chalked the high bar for her, but not the low bar. She shrugged it off – she would just have to practice her release moves for now. It was too hard to chalk the bar in grips, and she couldn’t be bothered taking the hand straps off again.

Dipping her hands into the chalk bowl, she covered her hands and grips in the white powder, topping it off with a spray of water to set it like a paste.

Once she was satisfied, she walked beneath the bars, jumping up as high as she could and grasping onto the high bar. A few empty swings generated enough momentum for her to cast up into a handstand.

She immediately swung down, arching her body through the position required for a Tkatchev, before flicking up and releasing the bar.

Her fingertips just grazed it on the other side, sending her crashing to her knees on the crash mat.

With an angry punch into the mat, she pulled herself to her feet. Without even bothering to rechalk her grips, she jumped up and grasped the bar again, frustration coursing through her as she pulled herself to handstand atop the bar. She swung down, releasing the bar and soaring over it, but once again, she missed it. This time, her hands were well clear of the bar as she came crashing to the floor.

Screwing up her face in frustration, she got up, hastily using a nearby block of chalk to recoat her grips, before casting it aside and jumping up again.

She attempted it again, but her heart and her mind were battling against her. With a feeble scrape across the top of the bar, she slid off, hitting the mat with a thump.

Angrily punching the mat again, she undid the buckles on her grips, wrenching them off her hands and throwing them away. Hot tears were spilling down her cheeks, dripping down onto the vinyl mat surface beneath her in little puddles.

With a heaving breath she didn’t know she’d been holding, the deluge came, her shoulders shaking as she brought a chalky hand up to her face to try and stifle the sobs. It was futile; the tears were coming whether she wanted them or not.

“What’s the matter, JJ?” came Nick’s voice, much gentler than before. His soft demeanor and the kindness behind his words were enough to send the real reason she’d been acting out rattling up her throat like vomit.

“No-one wants me on this team,” she sobbed, her voice harsh behind her tears. “Everyone thinks I stole a place from Jordyn and that she should be the one going to London, not me”

“JJ…,” Nick said softly.

“To them I’m just a glorified beam specialist who can’t do shit as an all-arounder, and to some people, I’m just the eye candy who every guy is going to want to bend over a balance beam,” she spat. Nick winced at the last comment, taking a deep breath as he closed his eyes.

“JJ… you can’t read what people say online. The couch gymnasts of the world don’t know what goes on behind Martha’s decision making, you can’t put any stock into what they say”

“But what if they’re right?” JJ cried, pulling herself to her feet as more tears cascaded down her cheeks. “What if I go to London and completely headcase, what are they going to say then?”

“You can’t worry about it,” Nick reminded her gently, holding out a hand to steady her. “Your job is to come in here every day and do the work required of you, and repeat the motions in competition. Nothing else. I don’t want you reading anything online JJ, because none of it is true. You _earned_ that spot. If it came at the expense of Jordyn, well, that sucks, but so be it. You proved that you were the right fit for Martha’s team and if that’s not good enough for Jordyn’s rabid fans, then tough”

JJ drew in a shuddering breath, her eyes cast down to the floor as she hugged herself tightly beneath the bars.

“You are a good gymnast, JJ, hell, you have the potential to be great. Not that you aren’t already, but I know you can do even more one day. I just really need you to believe in yourself for once… it’s getting really tiring carrying enough faith for both of us,” Nick said, walking towards her and placing a hand on her shoulder. “Just promise me you won’t read anything else people put online, ok? There will always be people wanting to pull you down, but all you can do is hold your head up high and go out and prove them wrong”

JJ nodded weakly, sniffing as Nick pulled her into a hug.

After a few moments, he pulled away, watching her closely as she bent down to pick up the grips she’d thrown away before. And then one of the comments she’d made resounded in his head.

“Did… did someone really say that? About you and a balance beam?” he asked almost timidly. JJ looked up, only nodding sadly.

“God people are disgusting,” he muttered, shaking his head in disbelief. “Seriously don’t listen to those comments. Not worth giving them the time of day”

Nodding again, JJ slipped her grips back onto her wrists, taking a deep breath to settle herself as she wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand.

“C’mon kiddo… let’s get this bars routine whipped into shape”


End file.
